Yes, You Can Be

Happy Even After Betrayal Lust Porn

Take control of your own healing.

Start fighting for him instead of with him.

No one rides off into the sunset for a happily ever after. But some of us face especially painful hardships when our husbands fall prey to lust and pornography.

I know. I’ve been there. It can be daunting to know who you can trust to guide you. But you can experience “happily even after.” I’m living in it. {OK, my husband is leaning over my shoulder pleading, “Don’t sell them a bill of goods. Don’t let them think that this is easy.”} This is not going to be easy. In fact, my husband and I found the therapy and recovery tools the world offers to be terribly confusing at times. They are, at best, incomplete.

Let me suggest a braver, deeper, more sacred route:

Your marriage does not need recovery. It needs redemption.

Your marriage does not need recovery.

It needs redemption.

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Hi, I'm Dannah

I’d like to be a part of your redemption story. I don’t have all the answers to your questions. I’m not a trained counselor or expert. I’m just a woman who’s been where you are and wants to walk with you a while in your journey because I desperately needed a friend like that when I was where you are. It’s so helpful to learn from someone who’s been there.

Only God’s Spirit can bring your man to repentance, but you can influence your husband to seek the Lord and get the help he needs. Even when a man does not “obey the word” he can be “won . . . by the conduct” of his wife (1 Peter 3:1). You possess that power through Jesus Christ!

One last note: this book is for the woman who believes she is safe and hopes to rebuild trust and intimacy in her marriage after her husband has sinned. A key component of restoration is humble, authentic repentance and brokenness in your husband. You are not safe in your relationship if you are experiencing sexual, physical, or verbal abuse or repeated trauma from flagrant sin for which your husband is not repentant. If that's you, stop scrolling this website and call someone who can help you get into a safe place.

Hi, I'm Dannah

Endorsed With Love

Dannah Gresh does not . . . offer an ‘easy fix’, but she does offer hope. She writes, not from an ivory tower, but as one who has experienced the pain and found redemption.

A wiser and more trusted voice for reassuring faith and hope in your relationship with your husband would be hard to find.

…you feel lost and hopeless. Friend, you are neither. The God of the universe is with you, inviting you to open your heart to His healing and wisdom. This book will … show you a path to spiritual maturity …

Raw. Honest. Wise.

This is not your average marriage book.

This book has the real possibility of becoming a timeless tool that will save marriages for decades to come.

A must read that points to the grace, hope and redemption we can only find in Christ.

About the Book

Whether your marriage is suffering from pornography, addiction, an affair, or just years of unhappiness, Jesus Christ can help you redeem the broken places of your marriage. I wrote Happily Even After to be a friend who walks beside you. I long to help you:

Stop pretending everything is okay
Strengthen yourself in the Lord
Fight for your husband instead of with him
Discover 7 beliefs a marriage needs for redemption
Participate in your husband's redemption story

Let me show you how to experience healing, live with joy, and hold your head high so you can participate in God’s redemption story for your husband. You may feel like your story is over, but no one writes better—or happier—endings than Jesus.

About the Book

Stop pretending everything is okay
Strengthen yourself in the Lord
Fight for your husband instead of with him
Discover 7 beliefs a marriage needs for redemption
Participate in your husband's redemption story

67-70% of men in the Church could be classified as sex addicts

70% of wives of sex addicts experience symptoms of PTSD*

Nearly half of trauma survivors experience post-traumatic growth

Source: The Porn Epidemic: Problem, Consequence, and Hope

Source: The Prevalence of Moderate-to-High Posttraumatic Growth

You Deserve Help

Many women are becoming complacent about their husband’s struggle. Do not let that be you. Not all men are living in enslavement to a lustful mindset. And the fact that many are enslaved is no reason to simply accept it in your marriage. You must do something and you can!

Don’t let anyone tell you that pornography isn’t harmful. Prolonged exposure to this twisted version of God’s good gift does tremendous damage. That’s why you need to stop fighting with him and start fighting for him

What began as a sin problem, is now a brain problem.

Your husband can’t think straight! This kind of sin disables his mind, dismantles intimacy in a marriage, erodes sanity, destroys trust, and often leads to unfaithfulness. Where should you begin?

You need to take care of your own heart and mind first!

Yes, Because what your husband has done has most likely caused symptoms of betrayal trauma in you. Understanding that is a critical starting point. In fact, I write about this in chapter 3 of Happily Even After.

Ya know what? Let me send you that chapter right now! It’s titled “This is His Brain (and yours, sadly) on Sin.” It contains useful research to help you understand why you need and deserve help right now.

Learn 3 Reasons You Deserve Help!

Is Happily Even After for you?

Has your husband caused pain in your life? If the answer is yes, then, this book is for you. I’ve cried with, prayed with, and counseled no small number of women whose marriages were hanging by a thread because of their husband’s secret sin.

Women whose husbands could not or would not stop using pornography
Women whose husbands were actively hiding a growing mountain of debt related to their secret sin
Women who were overwhelmed by their husband’s addiction
Women with husbands who either would not or could not keep a job
Women whose husbands were actually living with another woman
Women with husbands who had sexual obsessions so vile that I cannot describe them here
Women whose husbands sent text messages to confess “the other woman”

These were precious believers whose faith was being rocked by the kind of mind-numbing pain you experience when the man you love reveals secret sin of any kind. No matter how strong we are, it knocks us to our knees. In the pages of Happily Even After, I’ll show you how to care for your own heart before you enter into the work of God’s redemption for your husband and your marriage.

Meet my Man - Bob

Hey, I should probably introduce you to my husband, Bob! He’s the hero of my heart. No one fought harder than he did for our marriage. The grip of addiction was strong, but Jesus was stronger! (And it’s time to tell you why I love that photo at the top of the page soooo much!) I searched high and low for just the right photo for that spot. It couldn’t be too happy. (Because that can feel like salt in a wound.) But it couldn’t be too hopeless. (You don’t need more of that right now, do you?) When I found this, I knew it was the one!

Our Podcast and Workshops

To help you in this work, my husband, Bob, and I have developed a handful of helpful resources—sort of a Happily Even After toolbox. I hope you will check out the following and use them if they are a good fit for you:

The Happily Even After podcast series with Bob and Dannah Gresh
In-person coaching with our team at Pure Freedom Master Class

Meet my Man - Bob

Our Podcast and Workshops

To help you in this work, my husband, Bob, and I have developed a handful of helpful resources—sort of a Happily Even After toolbox. I hope you will check out the following and use them if they are a good fit for you: